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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Roger Goodell 'Completely Skeeved Out' By Meeting With Ben Roethlisberger

NEW YORK—NFL commissioner Roger Goodell said Wednesday that Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger will serve a six-game suspension and must attend mandatory counseling, partially for violating the league's personal-conduct policy and partially for 'giving [Goodell] the creeps' during their Apr. 13 meeting. "Ben's bodyguards stood outside the door, and he assured me we were all alone and no one would bother us. Then he suddenly sat on my desk and tried to look at my notes, asking me what I was writing, if I was writing to another guy, or if I was telling someone else about him. At one point he sort of cornered me and I had to squeeze past him to get away," said Goodell, adding that he just tried to get the meeting over with as fast as possible. "He was so gross. And having his hair like that certainly doesn't help." Goodell also remarked that he would probably still change offices, although Roethlisberger's smell had mostly gone away.

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