Roger Goodell 'Completely Skeeved Out' By Meeting With Ben Roethlisberger

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Vol 46 Issue 16

Adam Wainwright Annoying Entire Ballpark By Announcing Pitch Count Out Loud

ST. LOUIS—Despite a stellar complete-game effort against the Mets Sunday, Cardinals ace Adam Wainwright managed to irritate every player, coach, member of the media, and spectator in the ballpark by shouting out his pitch count every single time he threw the ball. "One," Wainwright said after his first pitch, just seconds before acknowledging his second by shouting.

Great Boston Marathon Moments

Robert K. Cheruiyot set the new course record in this year's Boston Marathon, adding yet another chapter to the legend of this great road race.
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WAYNE, PA—Providing them the tools necessary to bridge a gap that both individuals say they were more than willing to maintain indefinitely, sources confirmed Monday that the advent of modern technology has unfortunately allowed distant friends Mere...

Roger Goodell 'Completely Skeeved Out' By Meeting With Ben Roethlisberger

NEW YORK—NFL commissioner Roger Goodell said Wednesday that Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger will serve a six-game suspension and must attend mandatory counseling, partially for violating the league's personal-conduct policy and partially for 'giving [Goodell] the creeps' during their Apr. 13 meeting. "Ben's bodyguards stood outside the door, and he assured me we were all alone and no one would bother us. Then he suddenly sat on my desk and tried to look at my notes, asking me what I was writing, if I was writing to another guy, or if I was telling someone else about him. At one point he sort of cornered me and I had to squeeze past him to get away," said Goodell, adding that he just tried to get the meeting over with as fast as possible. "He was so gross. And having his hair like that certainly doesn't help." Goodell also remarked that he would probably still change offices, although Roethlisberger's smell had mostly gone away.

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