adBlockCheck

Recent News

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
End Of Section
  • More News

Royal Family Releases Kate Middleton Ultrasound Image

LONDON—Excited members of the British royal family released an ultrasound image Tuesday morning showing the unborn child of the former Kate Middleton, the Duchess of Cambridge, whose pregnancy was officially announced yesterday. “We are so thrilled to release this image of our future monarch, whose prophesied moment of ascension we await anxiously,” proud great-grandmother-to-be Queen Elizabeth II told reporters. “Soon it shall be with us. Soon all will be as foretold.” Representatives for the royal family claimed the child’s mother was “unable” to be interviewed, as she “needs much rest—the vessel requires strength.”

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close