According to a study published Tuesday by sociologists at Princeton University, slapping every single person in a grocery store and then baring one’s genitalia in the produce department remains an act roundly frowned upon by modern society.
WASHINGTON, DCI. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, the indicted former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney, wishes he had stopped answering to his nickname before it was featured so prominently in the news, he confided Monday. "Scooter's fine if it's just the president or Mr. Cheney," said Libby, whose involvement in the Valerie Plame case has made his name notorious. "But when I see it on CNN, I want to hide." If implicated in the Plame leak, Libby could face up to 30 years in a facility where he would almost certainly be given a new nickname.