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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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SeaWorld To Discontinue Great White Shark Ride

ORLANDO, FL—Citing flagging popularity and recurrent technical problems over the attraction’s 10-year run, SeaWorld Orlando announced that it will permanently shutter its great white shark ride, officials for the theme park announced Tuesday. “Due to a number of difficulties related to maintenance costs and a mixed customer response, we have decided to shut down our great white shark ride indefinitely,” SeaWorld spokesman Robert Hawes said of the long-running attraction, which allows adults and children to touch, swim with, and ride atop 7,000-pound great white sharks in a large tank. “We had hoped that visitors of all ages would be thrilled at the chance to fall in love with these magnificent predators up close, but, regrettably, this did not prove to be the case.” Officials added that at no time during the ride were any great white sharks hurt or endangered, and that in fact they were the happiest and healthiest of all the park’s animals.

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