SALEM, OR—Saying their respective justifications were “good to go” whenever necessary, local couple Mark Wondrich, 25, and Cara Marshall, 27, reported Friday that they each have a comprehensive list of reasons why they should break up with the other on standby.
WASHINGTON, DC—Although Secret Service Special Agent Michael Schilling is adept at assuming a low profile while protecting the president, he can't help betraying his admiration for his idol, comedian and former Blankman star David Alan Grier, sources said Tuesday. "While on counter-sniper duty, sometimes Michael will get on the headset and talk about what hilarious thing Grier did in a similar situation on DAG," said fellow agent John Matthews, referring to the short-lived 2000 sitcom in which Grier played a Secret Service agent. "We can't even file a simple report without him relating everything to an In Living Color sketch." Schilling is currently facing disciplinary suspension after he followed Dick Cheney to the podium before a recent speech to insist that the vice president borrow one of his DVDs of DAG's first season.