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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Several NFL Teams Express Interest In Your Sister

NEW YORK—­Saying that there are plenty of franchises that would “love to have her,” league sources reported Wednesday that multiple NFL teams have expressed high levels of interest in your sister. “We’ve had our eye on her for a while, and we’re confident she has a whole lot to offer this organization,” said Colts GM Ryan Grigson, echoing the sentiment of 12 interested parties who “like what [they’ve] seen so far” from the coveted 18-year-old. “She’s got just the kind of build we’re looking for. What is she, by the way? A college freshman? Wow, she’s really matured over the past few years. She certainly has our attention.” Sources also noted that many of the involved teams were willing to offer your sister “significant compensation” in return for her services.

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