adBlockCheck

Sheepish Timberwolves Fire Placekicker

Top Headlines

Sports

Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Sheepish Timberwolves Fire Placekicker

MINNEAPOLIS—The Minnesota Timberwolves gave fresh ammunition to critics of their recent personnel moves Monday night when they made announced that placekicker Dave Rayner, claimed off waivers on Nov. 30 after being cut from the Kansas City Chiefs, had been cut from the roster. "We appreciate the contribution Dave made to the team in his time here, but he did not fill our need for an actual basketball player," coach Randy Wittman said of Rayner, who scored fewer than four points per game for Minnesota, far below the NBA and his NFL averages. "I hope Dave finds challenges worthy of his talents." Wittman then introduced controversial new Timberwolf signing jockey Willie Shoemaker III, admitting that while the project player has less than ideal size, his pedigree was too good to pass up.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close