Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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'Shot Clock, Game Clock Off By About 3 Seconds,' Reports Clark Kellogg For 86th Time During Timeout

INDIANAPOLIS—With 22 seconds remaining in the first half of Friday’s Louisville-Oregon Sweet 16 matchup, CBS color commentator Clark Kellogg has reportedly mentioned the three-second differential between the shot clock and game clock approximately 86 times during a full timeout called by the Cardinals. “I just want to remind the audience at home that the shot clock and game clock are off by about three seconds,” said Kellogg for the 42nd time during the timeout, moments before observing that the shot clock and game clock were off by about three seconds. “The Cardinals have to be thinking about how the shot clock and game clock are off by about three seconds. The fact that the shot clock and game clock are off by about three seconds has to be on the minds of the Ducks, too.” At press time, Louisville guard Peyton Siva had just received the inbound pass as Kellogg began re-emphasizing the implications of the shot clock and the game clock being off by about three seconds.

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