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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?
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Slow Month In Baseball Saved By A-Rod

DENVER—Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez found a way to inject some excitement into baseball and make the slow month of October interesting last Sunday when he announced that he would opt out of his quarter-of-a-billion dollar contract with New York in order to become a free agent this offseason.

The unusually slow month, the only interesting point of which was a seemingly unending array of baseball games—some of which even went past their usual nine-inning limit—was very nearly a complete disappointment for the league. Now, however, the clutch statement by Rodriguez has inspired fan interest once again and has many fans and members of the baseball media calling Rodriguez "a contemporary Mr. October."

"Thank you, A-Rod," said ESPN's Peter Gammons, who left a baseball game in Denver between the Boston Red Sox and the Colorado Rockies immediately after hearing the news Sunday and flew to Legends Field in Tampa to get comments from Yankees front man Hank Steinbrenner. "We desperately needed something to get us out of the never-ending drudgery that is fall baseball. This is a real treat. "

The announcement, made during the late innings of what thankfully and at long last turned out to be the final game of the 2007 season, came as a welcome respite to many. For the past month, baseball fans around the nation endured the interminable and repetitive process of determining the two league champions, followed by the predictable coronation of one overall champion.

"A-Rod's decision about free agency is what I have been waiting for all October," Boston resident Nat Boyle said. "Would A-Rod forfeit the remaining $91 million on his contract? Would the Texas Rangers be responsible for subsidizing $30 million of his salary? I mean, ever since I was a kid, that's what October has been all about."

Boyle's statement echoed the sentiments of millions and millions of fans watching the final baseball game on television, who, following Rodriguez's disclosure of his future plans were delighted by endless commentary on the situation by Fox's Joe Buck and Tim McCarver.

According to viewers, both Buck and McCarver thankfully talked for inning after exhilarating inning about what team Rodriguez might play for next year, what he must have been thinking to walk away from a $30 million annual salary, and what his decision meant for the future of the New York Yankees—a team that was not playing baseball at the time of the announcement and is not scheduled to play another professional baseball game until April 2008.

"I was dozing off there in the eighth [inning] right after I think some guy hit a home run to bring us within one run of tying," said Colorado resident Russ Gamble, who was in attendance at Coors Field at the time of the announcement. "But then my buddy nudged me, told me the news about A-Rod, and I was like, 'Man, this is fucking incredible!' I was literally on the edge of my seat thinking about where he might end up in 2008. Cubs? Tigers? Red Sox? Oh man, if I were the Red Sox, A-Rod would be my number-one priority."

Added Gamble: "Someday, I can tell my kid that I was at some baseball game when [Rodriguez's agent] Scott Boras sent an e-mail to the Associated Press saying that A-Rod had just opted out of the final three years on his 10-year, $252 million contract."

According to other fans in attendance, the entire stadium was "simply electric" from the moment of Rodriguez's announcement until the last out of the game, at which point many stated they became "extremely depressed" upon the realization that Rodriguez had very little chance of ending up in a Rockies uniform.

However, no matter where he eventually plays, Rodriguez's October legacy is now assured.

"Two things you can always bank on in October," ESPN's Baseball Tonight host Tim Kurkjian said. "One, baseball is thankfully almost over. And two, Alex Rodriguez will always be available to provide the fans with the kind of off-field heroics for which he has become so famous. Now, his contract belongs to the ages."

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