CORPUS CHRISTI, TX—With her initially stated desire for restored wide-plank floors and a walk-in pantry having already been broadened to any hardwood or laminate flooring and decent kitchen storage space, sources confirmed Friday that aspiring homeowner Chelsea Lange has supplied a progressively vaguer description of her dream home with each new place she reviews in her price range.
DENVER— The Colorado Crush, a Denver-based professional or semi-professional sports team, defeated the Columbus Destroyers 50-47 in an apparently close game of some description last Monday, sources report. "It was great to win our season opener," team captain and center Kyle Moore-Brown told reporters via phone, giving no visual cue as to which sport he played. "Anyone who follows the league knows that Columbus is tough, and just scoring against them is an accomplishment in itself. It's going to be a great season." Although it could not be confirmed at press time, it is assumed that the Destroyers and the Crush do in fact play the same sport.