Sources Close To Team Wish They Could Talk With Reporters About Something Other Than Rumors For A Change

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Vol 48 Issue 33

Breaking Bad

AMC 10:00 p.m. EDT/9:00 p.m. CDT Walt ups the ante when he discovers he can make much more money through careful observation of financial trends and prudent investment in the stock market.

Torrent Time

G4 4:00 a.m. EDT/3:00 a.m. CDT This virtual showcase presents a selection of the web's most popular illegal downloads. This week: a Croatian dub of the The Dark Knight Rises and some pornography.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Pop Culture

Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

Sources Close To Team Wish They Could Talk With Reporters About Something Other Than Rumors For A Change

AUSTIN, TX—Sources close to the University of Texas football team declined to speak with reporters Monday about who head coach Mack Brown was likely to name as starting quarterback, and asked if the journalists would mind talking about something besides rumors for once. "It just seems like all we ever talk about is rumors about recruitment, depth, charts, or injuries—it's the same shop talk every damn day," said one source, who confirmed that it had been months since he'd felt as though he'd had a normal, human interaction with a reporter. "You could at least ask us how we're doing every now and then, but no, it's always straight to 'How'd David [Ash] look in training camp this week?' Did you ever stop and think sources might just want to talk about favorite restaurants or hopes and dreams?" At press time, sources close to sources had given credence to rumors that the sources' outburst might have been due in part to undisclosed personal issues.

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