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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

The Onion’s Fall TV Preview

Networks are just weeks away from debuting their Fall lineups, featuring both new shows and returning favorites. The Onion breaks down what to watch this Fall.

Most Anticipated Panels At Comic-Con

San Diego Comic-Con kicks off tomorrow, and this year’s schedule is packed with must-see events. Here are the most highly-anticipated panels of Comic-Con 2017.
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Spielberg Panics, Adds Comical Groin Injuries To 'Lincoln'

LOS ANGELES—Growing nervous after watching a rough cut of his upcoming biopic Lincoln, director Steven Spielberg reportedly re-edited the entire film in a bout of panic, inserting a recurring gag that involves the 16th president repeatedly suffering injuries to the groin. “Steven realized that given the brutal scenes of slavery, the horrific Civil War battles, and an ending in which the hero is killed in cold blood, his movie might benefit from a little comic relief,” said a source at DreamWorks Pictures, adding that the film includes a “hilarious” rail-splitting scene in which an ax head flies off its handle and hits the Great Emancipator squarely in the genitals, as well as a humorous mishap that causes Lincoln to open the Gettysburg Address with the words “Four score and seven years agooOOOWWW!” “We spent about a week shooting pickup footage, and Daniel Day-Lewis got so into character he would improvise taking-it-in-the-nuts routines that weren’t even in the script. He even had an assistant kick him in the balls between takes just so he could keep himself in the same frame of mind Lincoln would have been in at the time.” Reports from early screenings indicate overwhelming audience approval of the film’s new ending, in which John Wilkes Booth shoots Lincoln, screams “Sic semper tyrannis!” and leaps from the Ford’s Theatre balcony only to land crotch-first on an iron handrail.

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