States Now Offering Millions In Tax Breaks To Any Person Who Says ‘High-Tech Jobs’

Top Headlines


The next generation of PC's – Dell, HP, Intel, and Lenovo

Pros And Cons Of Screen Time For Kids

As technology becomes more of a staple in everyday family life, parents are making choices about how much screen time to allow their children—and asking questions about how computers, phones, and TVs might help or hinder a child’s development.

How Recycling Works

With humans consuming an increasing amount of resources, the process of recycling has become more important than ever for protecting the planet.

Modernized Space Camp Allows Kids To Simulate Frustration Over Lack Of Funding

HUNTSVILLE, AL—Aiming to provide attendees with an authentic glimpse into the nation’s space program, representatives for the U.S. Space & Rocket Center announced Thursday that its newly updated Space Camp will allow children to simulate the anger and mounting frustration experienced by NASA personnel over a continual lack of funding.

How Twitter Is Trying To Retain Users

Twitter’s stock price has fallen in recent months amid growing concerns that the microblogging site is losing steam among users and having trouble finding a mainstream audience.

Tips For Troubleshooting Your Computer

Even the most experienced user can run into error messages, software crashes, hardware malfunctions, and other issues with their computer. Here are some tips for keeping your machine running smoothly

Tech Is The Future, Reports Local Dad

NAPERVILLE, IL—Beginning his remarks by saying “These tech guys, I’ll tell you what,” local dad Alan Estlin stressed in conversation with his daughter today the important role he foresees the technology industry playing in the futu...

New Device Desirable, Old Device Undesirable

SEATTLE—"The new device is an improvement over the old device, making it more attractive for purchase by all Americans," said Thomas Wakefield, a spokesperson for the large conglomerate that manufactures the new device. "The old device is no longer sufficient. Consumers should no longer have any use or longing for the old device."
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage


  • How Theaters Are Trying To Win Back Moviegoers

    The number of Americans who went to the movies hit a 20-year low in 2014, leaving theaters scrambling to find ways to incentivize the public to see new releases on the big screen rather than watch films at home or on the internet. Here are some methods theaters are using to win back audiences and increase box office sales:


The next generation of PC's – Dell, HP, Intel, and Lenovo

States Now Offering Millions In Tax Breaks To Any Person Who Says ‘High-Tech Jobs’

ST. PAUL, MN—In an effort to spur their local economies, many state governments are now offering tens of millions of dollars in tax breaks to any person who simply says the words “high-tech jobs,” according to a survey by the Pew Research Center published Monday. “We must do what it takes to draw potential innovators to the great state of Minnesota, which means granting lucrative tax credits and loan guarantees to any individual—whoever they may be—who utters the phrase ‘high-tech jobs’ in any context whatsoever,” said Minnesota governor Mark Dayton, whose office has reportedly joined numerous other states in doling out tax exclusions, low-interest municipal loans, full income tax exemption for 10 years or more, and other valuable incentives to thousands of people who have spoken such phrases as “biotech,” “innovation center,” “high-skilled workers,” and “tomorrow’s economy.” “Anyone who can say those words will get all the taxpayer-financed assistance they want, no questions asked. We can also provide tax-free property and generous relocation packages to anyone who recites the phrase ‘regional technology hub.’ Heck, we’ll raze a nice big plot of land for you in any city in the state at your request. Seriously, we’ll do whatever you want—don’t be afraid to ask.” Economic experts told reporters that the new incentive programs aim to replicate the success achieved by the municipalities of California’s Silicon Valley, which in the 1970s established the area as the world’s technological epicenter by offering production subsidies to anyone who mentioned the word “computer.”

Technology Video