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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Struggling 'Pittsburgh Post-Gazette' Asks Sidney Crosby To Cover Penguin Playoff Series

PITTSBURGH—Immediately following an interview Wednesday with Sidney Crosby, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reporters handed their notepads, cameras, and press passes to the Penguins captain and asked him to cover the Eastern Conference Finals. "You'll be there already, right?" said sportswriter Dave Molinari, assuring Crosby he would receive the newspaper's standard $85 in compensation for each freelance article accepted. "It would save the paper a lot of time and money is all. Just remember to spell-check, because there's no real Sports editor anymore." Crosby graciously accepted the position despite misgivings that it may place extra stress on him during the conference finals and while finishing the cooking articles he was assigned for Tuesday's Lifestyle section.

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