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Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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Sun Myung Moon Funeral To Be All Weird, Sources Report

GAPYEONG, SOUTH KOREA—Citing the myriad bizarre religious customs practiced by the Unification Church, sources told reporters Monday that they expect the funeral of recently deceased founder Rev. Sun Myung Moon to be all weird and shit. “I mean, the guy said he was the messiah, so it’s definitely going to be super freaky,” said Tsuyoshi Hwang, 31, who further speculated that a bunch of different people in outlandish outfits would likely make speeches and then maybe do some kind of strange group dance. “There will probably be some big weird altar and people will probably chant like a bunch of nutjobs while they put him into the ground. And there will definitely be some crazy-ass hats and stuff. That’s basically a given.” At press time, sources confirmed the ceremony would probably involve a point when all 3 million members of the odd cult commit suicide in a really weird way.

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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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