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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Super Bowl Football To Be Slightly Bigger

TAMPA BAY, FL—In an equipment regulation change calculated to increase viewer interest in professional football's championship game, National Football League officials announced Monday that the footballs used in the Super Bowl would be somewhat bigger than their regular-season counterparts. "The length of the ball will be increased from 11 inches to 14, which will make the ball about a yard around at its widest point when inflated to the new pressure of 48 pounds per square inch," the NFL Rules Committee announced Monday. "We believe this will bring a new dimension to both the passing and running games. Good luck." In light of the new football size, coaches for both the Steelers and Cardinals are advising their players to wear gloves, carry the ball with both arms at all times, and lift with their legs and not their backs when recovering fumbles.

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