Taxpayer Outraged

Top Headlines

Recent News

Most Likely Candidates For Trump’s Cabinet

If elected president, Donald Trump will have the opportunity to nominate up to 15 cabinet members, each advising him on executive departments. Here are the most rumored choices for Trump’s inner circle.

Cake Just Sitting There

Take It

CHICAGO—Assuring you that there was nothing to worry about and not a soul around who would see you, sources confirmed Tuesday that a large piece of chocolate cake was just sitting there and that you should go ahead and take it.

Siblings Each Hoping Other One Will Take Care Of Aging Parents Someday

CLEVELAND—Explaining that they simply didn’t want to have to deal with the immense time commitment and emotional exhaustion, sisters Katie and Ellen Cattell each privately admitted to reporters this week that they were hoping the other sibling would someday be the one to take care of their aging parents.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Taxpayer Outraged

PETERSBURG, VA—Claiming that this is unacceptable and he just won’t stand for it, a local taxpayer expressed outrage Tuesday, sources confirmed. “This is an outrage,” said the visibly angry man, who indicated that he pays federal, state, and local taxes. “Can you believe this crap?” A second local taxpayer standing nearby reportedly voiced his agreement with the man, stating that, indeed, this crap was an outrage and not to be believed.


Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close