Taylor Swift Now Dating Suri Cruise

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Fuck Everything, Nation Reports

WASHINGTON—Following the fatal shooting this morning at a Connecticut elementary school that left at least 27 dead, including 20 small children, sources across the nation shook their heads, stifled a sob in their voices, and reported fuck everything...

McDonald's Prints Calorie Count Right Onto Meat

A rare pornographic movie is shot at the Vatican for the first time since 1982's 'Pope Fisters IV,' Taylor Swift is apparently now dating 'Garfield' creator Jim Davis, and Mumford and Sons can't believe they all got each other mandolins for Christmas.
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Taylor Swift Now Dating Suri Cruise

NEW YORK—Following her recent string of high-profile relationships, including a romance earlier this week with Garfield cartoonist Jim Davis, singer-songwriter Taylor Swift is now dating Suri Cruise, sources confirmed today. “Taylor and Suri were seen grabbing lunch at a Thai restaurant in SoHo earlier this afternoon, and we can confirm that the two are now officially an item,” TMZ reporter Allison Raeber wrote of the budding romance between the 23-year-old pop star and the 6-year-old daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, nicknaming the couple “Saylor.” “Fans spotted the two holding hands on the way out of the restaurant, and Taylor was even seen giving Suri a quick peck on the lips before getting into a car.” At press time, sources reported that Swift had just entered Cruise’s apartment building in downtown Manhattan.

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