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Team Returns To Stadium In Dead Of Night To Retrieve All They Left On Field

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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Team Returns To Stadium In Dead Of Night To Retrieve All They Left On Field

COLUMBUS, IN—Members of the New Albany Bulldogs high school football team reportedly returned to East Stafford Stadium in the dead of night Friday and attempted to recover everything they had left on the field earlier in the evening. “We left everything we had out there, which was great, but now we have to get it back before our next game,” said Bulldogs starting tailback Chris Stephens, adding that the team also needed all of it for practice. “After a long bus ride home, we suddenly realized we just left it all sitting there, strewn all over the field. Of all the stupid things to forget, ‘everything we had’ has to be the dumbest.” After a two-hour search, the team expressed frustration upon discovering their opponents had taken everything the Bulldogs had left out there, with the East Stafford Raiders claiming it was their own absolute best.

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