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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Teammates Pretty Sure Ben Roethlisberger Can No Longer Remember Their Names

PITTSBURGH— After Ben Roethlisberger repeatedly addressed his Pittsburgh teammates as "dude," "Mac," and "you there" for an entire practice session last Monday, the quarterback's fellow Steelers concluded that the oft-concussed Pro Bowler is unable to remember their names. "I walked up to him in the locker room and said, 'Hey Ben,' and he responded, 'Hey...brother,'"said a teammate who spoke on the condition of continued anonymity. "He only used a first name once, and that was when he was talking to Troy Polamalu. And he kept calling him Randy." When asked if he would be ready for Sunday's game, Roethlisberger said that as the third-string goalie, there is only so much he could do.

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