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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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Tennessee Men's Lady Vols Eliminated From NCAA Tournament

DAYTON, OH—In a dramatic three-point play with 7.2 seconds left in their first-round game, the No. 9 seed Tennessee Men's Lady Vols fell 77-75 to Oklahoma State last Friday. "With their heart and aggressiveness, these young guys really represent what it means to be a Men's Lady Vol," said coach Bruce Pearl, adding that the team really gelled after a talk on teamwork from Tennessee head basketball coach Pat Summitt. "With so many talented athletes on the court, we all knew it was going to come down to the wire. Hopefully, next time Mr. Lady Luck will be on our side." Rounding out a disappointing weekend for Tennessee, its heavily favored Women's Lady Vols title defense ended much sooner than expected.

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