The High Reis: I Don't Care About Politics So Obama Shouldn't Care About Sports

In This Section

Vol 47 Issue 03

"Late Inning Drama" Episode Guide

Episode 1: Odd Manager Out The Arrows have a new manager, but he's not what he seems. Masters thinks there's a killer on the team, but all his evidence is circumstantial. Meanwhile he's giving up monstrous home runs. Will the team crack their los...

In Memory Of Susan Merriweather

With great regret, we wish to inform you of the death of Onion News Network international reporter Susan Merriweather. Susan, who started at the Onion News Network as Today Now's denim correspondent in 2002 and worked her way up to become one of the netwo...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Race Relations

Small Business

The High Reis: I Don't Care About Politics So Obama Shouldn't Care About Sports

I work in sports on television as a man who talks about the sports stories of the day. I get on TV and I say if the players did bad or if the coaches did bad or if the teams did bad. I don't care about people who make laws so I don't say things about things like that.

That is what drives me crazy about the President Barack Obama. He is saying the Bears are going to win the Super Bowl which is a sports thing.

He did this a long time ago when he said North Carolina would win the Final Four. He said this and at first I was like "who is this who cares what he says." Then I found out that he was the president when he said it and I'm like "when did that happen" and they're like "He was elected in November it was historic." I didn't know about it because I don't read the newspapers I watch a lot of sports.

Then he said he was sad LeBron went to the Miami Heat. come on, you're the president I don't go around caring about what YOU do. Do you make laws? Do you decide wars and judges? I don't even know and I won't know because I am busy doing SPORTS.

One last story as I said previously he is now saying that the Bears will win and he wants them to win. HELLO I think you have a JOB to do. I don't know what it is but I hear about your name a lot and I hear about the "president of the United States" a lot so you clearly have to be busy.

Anyway that's what I think about sports and politics.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More