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Strongside/Weakside: Deshaun Watson

After leading his team to victory in the College Football Playoff National Championship, Clemson University quarterback Deshaun Watson announced he would forgo his final year of eligibility and declare for the NFL Draft. Is he any good?

NFL Implements New Court Date Attire Regulations

NEW YORK—Citing players’ responsibility to represent themselves and the league in a professional manner, the NFL announced a new set of regulations Monday governing the attire that players are allowed to wear during court dates.

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.
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The High Reis: I Don't Care About Politics So Obama Shouldn't Care About Sports

I work in sports on television as a man who talks about the sports stories of the day. I get on TV and I say if the players did bad or if the coaches did bad or if the teams did bad. I don't care about people who make laws so I don't say things about things like that.

That is what drives me crazy about the President Barack Obama. He is saying the Bears are going to win the Super Bowl which is a sports thing.

He did this a long time ago when he said North Carolina would win the Final Four. He said this and at first I was like "who is this who cares what he says." Then I found out that he was the president when he said it and I'm like "when did that happen" and they're like "He was elected in November it was historic." I didn't know about it because I don't read the newspapers I watch a lot of sports.

Then he said he was sad LeBron went to the Miami Heat. come on, you're the president I don't go around caring about what YOU do. Do you make laws? Do you decide wars and judges? I don't even know and I won't know because I am busy doing SPORTS.

One last story as I said previously he is now saying that the Bears will win and he wants them to win. HELLO I think you have a JOB to do. I don't know what it is but I hear about your name a lot and I hear about the "president of the United States" a lot so you clearly have to be busy.

Anyway that's what I think about sports and politics.

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