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Strongside/Weakside: Deshaun Watson

After leading his team to victory in the College Football Playoff National Championship, Clemson University quarterback Deshaun Watson announced he would forgo his final year of eligibility and declare for the NFL Draft. Is he any good?

NFL Implements New Court Date Attire Regulations

NEW YORK—Citing players’ responsibility to represent themselves and the league in a professional manner, the NFL announced a new set of regulations Monday governing the attire that players are allowed to wear during court dates.

Best Sports Documentaries

With ESPN’s film ‘OJ: Made In America’ emerging as an Oscars frontrunner this year, Onion Sports looks back at some of the greatest sports documentaries of all time.

Report: Look How Big Player Is Next To Sideline Reporter

GREEN BAY, WI—Marveling at the pronounced disparity in size during the postgame interview, sources confirmed Sunday that, Jesus Christ, just look at how big Houston Texans nose tackle Vince Wilfork is next to the CBS sideline reporter.

Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.
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The High Reis: Interview With Mark Shepard

Today I was bored so I decided to make a blog post by interviewing my SportsDome co-anchor Mark Shepard. I recorded it all on my voice recorder, but I dropped it down the sewer accidentally so I reconstructed the interview from memory. I tried to do a good interview, so here it is.

Why do you like working at SportsDome?

He talked for a while after this question and I don't remember what he said. He mentioned sports once or twice and I think he said something about "human drama" which is one of his favorite phrases, but I don't know what it means and I don't care to know either.

How much do you get paid?

Mark refused to answer this question.

What's your favorite sport?

He said soccer, then I made fun of him for a while and he got mad in that way where he doesn't admit he's mad, but I could tell because he turned red and he kept looking away and sighing a lot. I told him soccer was a sport for idiots and it was boring.

Why do you like working at SportsDome?

I accidentally asked this question twice.

How did you start working at OSN?

I don't remember what he said for this question.

I asked him another question that I forgot and in his answer he said something about "devil's food cake." Then we talked about devil's food cake for a while but that was off the record.

I also did an interview with Melissa Wells who is not an anchor but is always hanging around the studio. She walked off halfway through because the questions I was asking were "over the line." She said she was going to HR and although I think she was bluffing I'm not going to post the interview because I am already on thin ice.

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