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Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Benny The Bull Busted For Possession Of Unlicensed T-Shirt Gun

CHICAGO—Noting that the suspect had been taken into custody after officers managed to tackle and wrestle the individual to the ground of the United Center concourse, police confirmed Monday that Chicago Bulls mascot Benny the Bull was arrested for possession of an unlicensed T-shirt gun.
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The High Reis: Parking Garage Near Heat Arena Very Confusing

I decided to check out a Miami Heat game this week. I went with reporter's credentials so I could get in for free and then write about it for this blog. I don't remember who they were playing that night.

I got to Miami in the afternoon and drove a rental car to the arena. I found a parking garage a few blocks away. They tried to charge me eight bucks for a ticket, but I said no way, that is way too much. But the person at the booth said that is the price and I have to pay it. I could have gotten the receipt and had it paid for by the network, but I didn't want to pay eight bucks for parking. What is a parking spot? It is just an empty space. I don't think you should pay for an empty space on the ground, especially not eight bucks, which adds up. But anyway I took the ticket and went to park.

I went up the ramp to the second or third level. I walked around looking for an elevator but couldn't find one. I had seen elevators when I was driving around looking for a space, but now I couldn't find any. I saw flights of stairs, but screw that, I didn't want to walk down any stairs like a chump.

I got lost in the parking garage. There were a bunch of levels to it. I couldn't find an elevator or my car. Finally I found another person walking around so I decided to follow him. But he was getting into his car, not leaving. I stood in front of his car and shouted at him, I don't remember what I shouted or why I did it.

I was walking around for an hour, probably. I found a vending machine so I bought a couple things from there and ate them, next to the machine, because I don't like to eat while I'm walking. Then I looked at my watch and the game had already started, so I decided to forget the game. I found my car pretty quick after that, probably only 30 or 40 minutes.

When I got to the ticket thing, the woman tried to get me to pay the full eight bucks, even though I hadn't gone to the game, I hadn't even left the parking garage. I blew past her but they had one of those spike strips so my tires popped. So I got out and walked to a bus stop and eventually got to the airport.

My prediction: the Heat are playing well together and they will win the NBA title.

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