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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.
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Third Episode Of "Dumb In America" Investigates The Dumb Woman

In "Episode Three: The Dumb Glue Holding The Dumb Family Together," reporter John Harris continues his cross-country odyssey of dumbness by talking to imbecilic women. In one especially poignant vignette an idiotic woman's complains about her best friend’s boyfriend's sister for more than two hours. If you or someone you know is a woman, you can't miss this episode of "Dumb In America."

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