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What Is Trump’s Relationship With White Nationalism?

Since the weekend’s violent protests in Charlottesville, VA, many have criticized President Trump for his failure to outright condemn the white supremacists involved. The Onion breaks down Trump’s relationship to this powerful hate group.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg Returns To Off-Season Lifeguarding Job

ALEXANDRIA, VA—Saying she hadn’t missed a summer since she was on the U.S. Court of Appeals, Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said Tuesday that she had once again returned to her off-season lifeguarding job at Splash Central waterpark.

President’s American Manufacturing Council Down To CEO Of Shoe Carnival

WASHINGTON—Following a series of resignations from prominent CEOs amid the fallout from President Trump’s handling of white-nationalist violence in Charlottesville, VA, White House sources confirmed Tuesday that Trump’s American Manufacturing Council is now down to a single member, Clifton Sifford, CEO and president of Shoe Carnival.

Contents Of The Voyager Golden Record

Forty years ago this week, NASA launched Voyager 2, which carries a gold-plated record featuring pictures and sounds from Earth as well as scientific information, all of which was carefully compiled in anticipation of a possible extraterrestrial encounter. Here are the contents of the record:
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Thriving 'Onion' Puts Another Print Edition Out Of Business

NEW YORK—Citing the publication’s ongoing struggle to compete in an industry long-dominated by thriving daily newspaper The Onion, officials from Newsweek magazine announced Thursday that they would cease print distribution at the end of the year, a move that makes their periodical the latest to succumb to the financial and editorial supremacy of America’s Finest News Source. “Newsweek has always endeavored to evolve and adapt in today’s challenging media landscape, but there is only so much you can do when you are in the same market as The Onion; readers eventually see how redundant and useless you are by comparison, and notice how inferior your journalism actually is,” Newsweek editor-in-chief Tina Brown said in a statement, adding that she prefers to get her news from The Onion, has applied for numerous jobs there over the years, and knows her applications have never made it past human resources because “I am simply not good enough to work there.” “In the past year alone, The Onion has expanded its print distribution to all 196 countries, generating untold profits in print advertising and bringing its total circulation to upwards of 3 billion. The print industry as a whole is facing an uphill battle when it comes to competing with The Onion, and that’s something we’ve had to accept today.” When reached for comment, The Onion’s publisher emeritus T. Herman Zweibel said, “It comes as little surprise to me that a news publication administered by the likes of a woman has failed. Good day.”

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