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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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T.O. In Dallas: The Next Michael Irvin Or The Next Michael Irvin?

DALLAS—While Cowboys fans are hailing talented, physically dominant wide receiver Terrell Owens' debut in Dallas as the coming of a new Michael Irvin, football analysts are warning that the flamboyant, outspoken locker-room distraction may instead turn out to be another Michael Irvin. "You've got to respect the talent of a player who, much like Michael Irvin before him, can't be kept out of the end zone and changes the way the game is played at his position," said Rick Gosselin, who covered Irvin's career as an eager sports columnist and reluctant police-beat reporter for the Dallas Morning News. "But no one has any respect for a big-mouthed Michael Irvin-style player who can't keep his name out of the papers and changes the way people think of the Cowboys." Former Dallas quarterback Troy Aikman, who played with Irvin in three Super Bowls, has publicly expressed belief in Owens' ability to equal at least one of Irvin's legacies, but added that no one would know until Owens lies motionless on the turf with a career-ending spinal-cord injury.

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