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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Tom Petty To Play Some New Stuff He's Been Working On At Super Bowl

PHOENIX—Veteran rocker Tom Petty, known for such classic hits as "Mary Jane's Last Dance," "The Waiting," and "Refugee," announced Monday that he will be using the Super Bowl XLII Halftime Show as a forum to "test out" some new songs that he's been working really hard on lately. "There's this one cool one that I'm pretty excited about that's called, like, 'Down And Out,' because it has this really down-and-out-like 'feel' to it—it doesn't have a chorus yet, but I think we're gonna open with that," Petty said, describing the song as "like 'Free Fallin',' but weirder." "After that, we'll probably do two different versions of 'Rock Rock Rock (Yeah!)' and see which one the crowd likes better. Then I have this guitar riff which technically doesn't have a song to go with it but it sounds awesome, and then [keyboardist] Benmont [Tench] wrote a song about the Super Bowl that I said I'd let him play." Petty has told the 65,000 fans in attendance and the estimated 95 million TV viewers that any feedback, positive or negative, would be appreciated.

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