Tonight In The Dome: Shaq To Be Traded And Broken Down For Parts, The Last Word On Super Bowl XLV, And More

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Content From 2011-02-08

Parents Really Enjoying Cruise

HAMTRAMCK, MI—According to a phone call made to their daughter Monday afternoon, Glen and Margery Bennings, 62, are really enjoying their Carnival Cruise thus far.

Connor's Corner

Here's a little tip for WONN-5 viewers. Did you know you can find up-to-date WONN-5 programming schedules online?

U-Say Response To Becker Decision

Was the Supreme Court's ruling against Tom Becker fair? Here's what U, the viewers, have to say: "That Becker guy is the worst. I'd rather have my ears bleed uncontrollably than listen to him drone on about the benefits of taekwondo again." --...

Is The Internet Full?

Last week, the organization that assigns IP addresses—unique numbers that identify the "location" of every device connected to the Internet—handed out its last available digits.

Puppy Bowl Marred By Tragic Spinal Injury

SILVER SPRING, MD—Puppy Bowl VII, puppy football's biggest annual event, came to a complete standstill Sunday when Alvin, a 3-month-old schnauzer mix, suffered a freak spinal injury while chasing down a loose squeaky football. The injury, which occu...

Widowzillas

TLC 8 p.m. EST / 7 p.m. CST Will the funeral director Cassie hired crack over her insistence that her departed husband’s hue is too orange, or will the arrival of a very slightly wilted funeral wreath deflect her wrath?
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  • Sports Drink Company Putting First Advertisement On Moon

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Tonight In The Dome: Shaq To Be Traded And Broken Down For Parts, The Last Word On Super Bowl XLV, And More

If your hair and teeth are falling out and your skin is covered with seeping blisters, you're still dealing with the Super Bowl fallout. The Green Bay Packers are Super Bowl XLV champs, and Mark Shepard and Alex Reiser are setting up a pigskin triage in the SportsDome with all the latest deets on Green Bay's win, the Steelers' bumbling giveaways and reaction from millions of men who look exactly like Mike McCarthy.

Tune in to Onion SportsDome TUESDAY 10:30/9:30c on Comedy Central.

It's not just Super Bowl. Here's the rest of what we're working on:

  • Shaquille O'Neal dealt to the Mavericks, who will dissect the big man and distribute his muscles and organs to their starting five.
  • The Baltimore Orioles are looking to bridge the revenue gap in the AL East by turning Camden Yards into a fully-functioning slaughterhouse.
  • Highlights of one man's epic battle against life.

All that and a Sports-Bird stuffed with Super Bowl analysis in the SportsDome.

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