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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Tony Romo Confident Bruised Ribs Won’t Hurt His Performance In Upcoming Ballet Recital

DALLAS—Despite suffering several bruised ribs during last weekend’s 36-31 victory over the New York Giants, Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo told reporters Friday that the injury will in no way hinder his performance in an upcoming recital of Pyotr Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake. “I might not be 100 percent by the opening scene, but it shouldn’t affect my pirouetting motion at all, or my ability to plié and hit a grand jeté at full speed,” said Romo, adding that while he has experienced some soreness in recent days, any discomfort will “absolutely not” diminish his role as Odette, Queen of the Swans. “Look, these things happen during ballet season. It’s been feeling better during rehearsal, so I’ll definitely be out there for all four acts this Saturday night. Sometimes you have to just dance through the pain, because at the end of the day, it’s all about the ensemble.” Romo did confirm, however, that he plans to wear a brace underneath his bodice to protect his ribcage while being lifted into the air.

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