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Totally Irresponsible Parents Remember To Drop Son Off At Football

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In light of its recent decision not to bar Russian athletes from competing in Rio despite their use of performance-enhancing drugs, the International Olympic Committee is working to establish more effective protocols to keep the Games drug-free. Here are some ways the IOC plans to address doping:
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Totally Irresponsible Parents Remember To Drop Son Off At Football

CRESTON, IA—Apparently not caring about the 10-year-old’s health or safety at all, local parents Laura and David Turner heedlessly remembered again to drop off their son Jacob at football practice, sources confirmed Tuesday. “Have fun, Jake,” said the negligent father, displaying the same reckless disregard for Jacob’s welfare as with the last 12 times he remembered to bring the child to football practice. “Listen to the coach and just try to do your best out there.” At press time, Jacob had reportedly been stuck there for three whole hours.

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