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Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Benny The Bull Busted For Possession Of Unlicensed T-Shirt Gun

CHICAGO—Noting that the suspect had been taken into custody after officers managed to tackle and wrestle the individual to the ground of the United Center concourse, police confirmed Monday that Chicago Bulls mascot Benny the Bull was arrested for possession of an unlicensed T-shirt gun.

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.
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Totally Predictable Ending To Wild NCAA Tournament Prepares Student-Athletes For The Rest Of Their Miserable, Ho-Hum Lives

NEW ORLEANS—After the usual exciting upsets, Cinderella stories, and unlikely triumphs that make up the NCAA men's college basketball tournament every March, No. 1 seed Kentucky defeated No. 2 seed Kansas to take the national title Monday, reestablishing the customary order of things and setting student-athletes in the tournament on the proper humdrum course for the rest of their lives. "I was really euphoric there for a few days after we beat Duke," said Lehigh star guard C.J. McCollum, who watched with his teammates in introspective silence as the overdog Wildcats took a commanding lead they never relinquished in their inexorable victory. "But then Xavier beat us, and Baylor beat them, and they lost to Kentucky, and now I just feel, I don't know. I guess this is just the way it goes." The feelings of inevitability, pointlessness, and hopeless futility inspired by Kentucky's victory are expected to serve all tournament participants well in their eventual careers as insurance salesmen, teachers, NBA basketball players, and sportscasters.

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