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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Tourist Realizes It's All Just A Lie Set In Place For Him

SAGEBRUSH, TX—An excursion to the Sagebrush Wild West Ghost Town ended in disillusionment Saturday, when, over the course of two hours, Lodi, NJ, resident Vic Coyne came to see the 'genuine 1873 frontier village' for the play-acting fantasy artifice it always was. "I was first taken aback by the blacksmith's shop with the concrete frame," Coyne said. "But I figured it could be a reconstruction from old photographs in cooperation with a local historical society." The final blow, Coyne said, was "the 'old-time' saloon, in which the bartender's nametag read 'Smilin' Joe' and a menu item read 'Old-Fashioned Sarsaparilla,' with 'Hires Root Beer' in parentheses."

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