Trail Blazers Down To One Working Knee

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Vol 47 Issue 07

Tim Duncan Urges All-Stars To Use Inside Voice During Game

LOS ANGELES—Saying he understands how excited everyone can get during an All-Star game, Spurs center Tim Duncan made it clear Saturday that since the game is held inside the Staples Center, he expects members of both teams to put their outside voice...

Area Dad Just Wants Computer With The Basics

EDISON, NJ—Wary of paying too much for a new computer loaded with unnecessary bells and whistles, area dad Paul Moyers, 52, announced Friday that he just wants a regular, no-frills PC with only the basics.

Military Releases Drone's Suicide Note

In a shocking turn of events, embattled military drone plane TR425 destroyed itself. Military officials released the following suicide note written by the airplane.

Healthy Living Tips For Shawnas

Having a healthy lifestyle isn't just about staying out of the sun (or out of a tanning bed). Here are some simple tips to help Shawnas participate in a healthier life.

New Arkansas Border

This artist's rendering depicts how the Arkansas state border will be affected by passage of the 2011 Fairness Through Casinos Act.
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Trail Blazers Down To One Working Knee

PORTLAND, OR—According to sources close to the injury-plagued Portland Trail Blazers, after a series of knee injuries to center Marcus Camby and All-Star guard Brandon Roy, the team is now officially down to one good knee. "Normally our strategy is to rest the knee so it can be ready for critical fourth-quarter situations, but right now we're letting LaMarcus Aldridge use it so he can be effective under the basket," head coach Nate McMillan told reporters, adding that he hopes the Blazers will continue their current winning streak so the knee can be saved for the playoffs. "Of course, Brandon will need the knee when he comes back, but to be honest, I'm worried that he'll just blow it out." McMillan added that he has a ton of working ACLs, MCLs, and a couple of good bursa sacs, but without multiple working knees, they're basically useless.

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