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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Troy Aikman Defends Disemboweling Joe Buck, Huddling Inside Corpse For Warmth

GREEN BAY, WI—His suit still smeared with the entrails and blood of his broadcasting partner, Fox color commentator Troy Aikman told reporters Monday that the sub-zero temperatures during Sunday's NFC title game necessitated gutting open play-by-by announcer Joe Buck, dumping his bowels onto the floor of the booth, and climbing inside the carcass late in the third quarter. "With the temperatures continuing to fall throughout the game, there was really little else I could do to avoid hypothermia," Aikman said, noting that his hands were so cold he was afraid of cutting his fingers off when making the incision from Buck's groin and drawing the knife up to the sternum during a TV timeout. "I hated to sacrifice Joe, but I was afraid for my life." Aikman said his colleague's sacrifice was noble in the extreme, but noted he'd thought Buck smelled bad on the outside.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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