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Biggest Announcements From E3

Each June, E3, or The Electronic Entertainment Expo, hosts game developers showing off their latest products. Here are this year’s most exciting announcements:

‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Turkish Actor Thinks He's Cüneyt Fucking Arkin

ISTANBUL—The cast and crew of the Turkish film Arada confirmed this week that local actor Ahmet Demir, 28, is strutting around the set like he’s goddamned film superstar Cüneyt fucking Arkin or something. “Who does this arrogant prick think he is? The two-time Golden Orange Award–winning star of Battal Gazi Destanı?” said the film’s cinematographer, Kadri Polat, shaking his head in irritation. “Look, I’ve worked with Cüneyt Arkin, and this guy’s no Cüneyt Arkin, okay? This asshole is a poor man’s Aytekin Akkaya—if that.” At press time, sources confirmed Demir “will be lucky to if he gets to make another picture at Film Sokaği Studios, that’s for goddamned sure.”

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