TWA Flight 800 Rebuilt, Ready To Return To Air

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Vol 33 Issue 06

History Channel Repeats Itself

NEW YORK—Tragically failing to learn the lessons of its own programming, the History Channel repeated itself 11 p.m. Sunday, airing Man's Inhumanity To Man: The Horror Of Auschwitz just three days after its initial broadcast. “This informative and important Holocaust documentary imparted many poignant lessons last Thursday,” Harvard University history professor Dr. Edmund O. Haller said. "But what has humanity really gained from witnessing The Horror Of Auschwitz if the History Channel ignores its painful lessons and allows it to air again? This is an atrocity that, sadly, could have easily been prevented if we had only learned its lessons the first time." Haller urged the management of the History Channel to watch its own programming attentively, “lest future generations be forced to repeat this dark hour of cable-TV programming.”

Sinatra, Hope, Reagan Deadlocked In Race To Grave

LOS ANGELES—Frank Sinatra’s recent hospitalization has pulled the aging crooner into a virtual dead heat with comedian Bob Hope and former president Ronald Reagan in their hotly contested race to death’s door, it was reported Monday. "We feel good about Mr. Sinatra’s prospects in this competitive graveyard derby," said Dr. Ben Ellis, Sinatra’s personal physician. "He is largely incoherent and responds poorly to bathing and feeding." Despite Sinatra’s rapidly deteriorating condition, officials for Hope and Reagan are confident. "Apart from one or two public appearances in the past year, Mr. Hope has been unable to function in any meaningful capacity outside his home," a Hope publicist said. Reagan, meanwhile, is proving a strong contender with a progressive neurological disease eroding his very wits. Las Vegas oddsmaker Danny Sheridan has Sinatra a slight 5-3 favorite to depart first, with Reagan second at 2-1.

Casey Martin Vs. The PGA

Last week, a federal judge ruled that golfer Casey Martin—who is afflicted with a circulatory disorder that makes it painful for him to walk—may use a motorized golf cart during PGA competition. The PGA contends that the use of a cart constitutes an unfair advantage, and plans to appeal the decision. What do you think?
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TWA Flight 800 Rebuilt, Ready To Return To Air

ST. LOUIS—At a jubilant press conference Wednesday, Trans World Airlines officials announced that, 19 months after its tragic crash off the coast of Long Island, NY, TWA Flight 800 is rebuilt and ready to return to the skies.

TWA Flight 800 stands ready on the runway at New York's John F. Kennedy Airport. The salvaged and rebuilt plane will make its return to the skies Mar. 20, flying a New York to Paris route.

"This is a day everyone at TWA has been dreaming of for a long time," TWA director of safety Walter Gorman said. "Ever since Flight 800 went down on July 17, 1996, taking 230 lives with it, Trans World Airlines has had one goal: to turn tragedy into triumph by getting that plane back together and up in the air once again."

Gorman said the rebuilt plane is the product of more than 4,200 trips to the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, during which every last bit of the wreckage of Flight 800 was painstakingly collected by divers, from landing-gear cables to altitude-indicator dials to tray tables.

"TWA has spent over $400 million reconstructing this airplane piece by piece, all to ensure that you, our valued customer, enjoys the same comfort and safety on Flight 800 that you would on any other TWA jet," Gorman said. "We've literally scoured the bottom of the ocean to stock this plane with extra pillows, comfy headrests, GTE Airfones, and all the other conveniences it offered travelers the first time around. And first-class passengers can look forward to lots of other recovered amenities, from a pieced-together wet bar to extra-wide, fully dried leather seats."

Added Gorman: "Give Flight 800 a second chance—we're confident you'll like what you see."

The reconstructed Boeing 747 will make its triumphant return March 20, flying the same New York to Paris route it was scheduled to fly July 17, 1996, when it went down shortly after takeoff from New York's John F. Kennedy Airport.

"What a proud, symbolic moment that will be on March 20, at 9:20 p.m. EST, when Flight 800 touches down at Paris' DeGaulle Airport, finally finishing what it set out to do a year and a half ago," Gorman said.

More than 220 non-refundable tickets for the flight have already been sold. It is not known how many of those who purchased them are aware the tickets are for Flight 800.

TWA officials expressed hope that the return flight will put an end to lingering questions about the cause of the 1996 crash, which is still under investigation by the National Transportation Safety Board.

"When Flight 800 finally soars through the air, it should prove once and for all to the NTSB, FAA, and any other doubters that this plane works perfectly and possesses no any mechanical defects whatsoever," TWA CEO Thomas Poquette said. "On March 20, 1998, Trans World Airlines is going to make front-page headlines once again—you just watch."

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