U-SAY Responses To Scandalous Horse Spread

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Vol 47 Issue 09

MLB Quietly Euthanizes 120 Unnecessary Players

NEW YORK—In what it called a basic housecleaning move, Major League Baseball euthanized 120 players Wednesday, including Tyler Colvin, Nolan Reimold, and 118 others deemed inconsequential or redundant.

Sources Say Atlanta Thrashers 27-28-11

ATLANTA—Sources from within the Atlanta Thrashers organization indicated Thursday that the team currently ranks 11th in the Eastern Conference standings with a record of 27-28-11.

Dead Teenager Remembered For Great Hand Jobs

GOLDSBORO, NC—Friends, classmates, and loved ones gathered last night at a memorial service in the Westside High School gymnasium to celebrate the life of 17-year-old Brooke Belzer, who, before she died tragically in a car accident last week, was beloved for her bright personality and for giving easily the best hand jobs in the school.
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U-SAY Responses To Scandalous Horse Spread

Juniper, the mare implicated in an affair with Congressman Ronald North, has agreed to do a four-page spread in Stud Farm magazine. What do U think?

"Juniper should be ashamed of herself, if horses have the ability to feel shame."
--Marcia J., Raleigh, NC

"If you're a horse who's got it, horse-flaunt it!"
--Timothy, Lowell, WI

"Juniper should not do it. That horse is a role model to little girls everywhere."
--Paula K., Cedar Rapids, IA

"It's sad that in our society the only way for a horse to get ahead is to use her body."
--Pamela S., Menasha, NV

"What's the big deal? She's naked all the time anyway."
--Jerry W., Philadelphia

"Juniper is clearly doing this because she was abused when she was young. I hear she was beaten with a riding crop daily and even had shoes nailed into her feet."
--Trudy M., Dallas

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