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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Vacation-Bound Rush Limbaugh To Do Nothing But Golf And Respect Minorities For 2 Weeks

PALM BEACH, FL—Popular radio personality Rush Limbaugh said on his show Tuesday that he is going to Honolulu for a 10-day vacation during which he plans to break away from his daily routine and "just play a lot of golf, eat, sleep, and treat minorities with respect and dignity." "Ten solid days of hitting the links, catching up on some reading, and not making obscene or hurtful racial comments—can't wait," said Limbaugh, adding that once he touches down on the Hawaiian island he's going to play 36 holes at the Waialae Country Club and treat Hawaii's diverse population of indigenous islanders, Filipinos, Chinese, and Japanese with the same consideration he would give white people. "Don't get me wrong—I love my job and I enjoy working my ill-informed fans into a frenzy by tapping into their deep-seeded, ignorant fears of people who are different from them. But when I'm on vacation, the phone is off, I'm not checking e-mail, and I don't even want to think about making iffy slurs or insensitive impersonations until I have to punch back in." Limbaugh also promised that he wouldn't ruin the vacation for himself by thinking about how strange it is that he's so popular.

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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

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