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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.
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Ventriloquist Dummy Crosses Line In Suggesting Partner Is Actual Dummy

STAMFORD, CT—In a breach of decorum never before seen in the history of the noble art, a ventriloquist's dummy named Chesterfield shocked onlookers this past Friday by referring to his partner, Professor Eugene Krebsen, as "the real dummy." Gasps turned to shouts of outrage in the Looking Glass Theater as the wooden doll's words settled across the audience, and what had been a sharp but kindhearted exchange between two seeming friends turned ugly. "Why, I couldn't believe my ears," said audience member Henrietta Flemming, sitting beside her husband, Harold Flemming. "And what's more, he lobbed that terrible insult while poor Professor Krebsen was trying to enjoy a nice glass of water." Patrons of the Looking Glass have not been this upset since stage magician Palmer the Great had the audacity to set an audience member's wallet on fire.

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