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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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Vince Young Rewatches 2006 Rose Bowl Game Alone At Bus Depot

BUFFALO, NY—In the wake of his release from the Bills earlier this week, quarterback Vince Young was reportedly spotted sitting alone Thursday night rewatching the 2005-2006 BCS National Championship game on his laptop at a Buffalo bus depot. “Just look at that speed, that agility, that confidence to break out of the pocket and make a play,” Young said to no one in particular, describing aloud the thrilling 41-38 victory over USC. “Fourth and five with 26 seconds left, the Longhorns down by five, can Young do it? There’s the snap, Young steps back to pass, now he takes off for the end zone. Go Vince Go! Touchdown! Vince Young wins it for the Longhorns!” After watching the national championship trophy presentation, sources confirmed that Young was heard mumbling, “This kid will be a huge NFL star someday.”

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Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

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