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Area Man Convinced He Could Have Been NFL Bust

DES MOINES, IA—Insisting that he possessed the physical and mental attributes to be one of the most disappointing draft picks of all time, local man Keith Parker, 34, was reportedly convinced Thursday that he could have been an NFL bust.

Nation’s Sanitation Workers Announce Everything Finally Clean

‘Please Try To Keep It This Way,’ Say Workers

WASHINGTON—After spending years sweeping and scrubbing across all 50 states, the nation’s sanitation workers announced Thursday that everything was finally clean and asked Americans if they could please keep it that way.
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Was the Chinese government justified in posthumously charging 20,000 citizens with "subversive seismic activity"?

More than 20,000 Chinese citizens were posthumously tried and charged with "subversion of state power by engaging in illegal seismic activity" for their role in the earthquake which destroyed nearly $500 million in government buildings. Was the charge justified?

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