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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Watching TV Shows On DVD The Way To Do It, Area Man Reports

MILLERSVILLE, PA—Local resident Thomas Humphrey, 36, blasted traditional American methods of viewing episodic television Monday, proclaiming that watching a series on DVD is "the way to do it." "There's no commercials, no waiting for next week's show, and you can stay up all night watching 14 episodes in a row if you want to," said Humphrey, adding that without the convenient digital medium, he would not have been able to view all three seasons of the canceled CW series Veronica Mars in a single week. "It turned out to be a pretty good show, and I would have never, ever watched that on regular TV because the time slots always changed. Who has the time to follow that stuff?" When asked if he had seen the final episode of The Wire, Humphrey became visibly upset, saying he is only on season three, and if reporters did not stop talking about it, he would leave the room.
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