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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Westboro Baptist Church Not Really Sure Why They’re Picketing Allan Arbus' Funeral

LOS ANGELES—Picketing outside a cemetery in Los Angeles today, members of the Westboro Baptist Church confirmed to reporters that they actually aren’t entirely sure why they chose to protest the funeral of television actor Allan Arbus. “Wait, who is this guy again? Some sort of TV star?” said church member Jill Holland while trying to find any real reason whatsoever why the death of Arbus, a fashion-photographer-turned-actor best known for his role as Dr. Freedman in the popular sitcom M*A*S*H, was God’s way of punishing America for its moral decay and cultural decadence. “As far as I know, he wasn’t gay or bisexual, or the victim of a high-profile mass shooting or terror attack, or an American soldier killed in combat or anything like that. In fact, I’m pretty sure we’re just holding ‘God Hates Fags’ signs outside the funeral of some 95-year-old man who used to be on television for a while.” At press time, church members had overheard that Arbus was of Jewish descent and said, “Okay, well, that’s something.”

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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

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