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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Which award does Brooke Alvarez's new book "Alone In The Herd Of Fools" more deserve to win?

This week Brooke Alvarez's new book "Alone In The Herd Of Fools," written during Brooke's recent six-day cruise to Mykonos, hits bookstores. Which of these awards do you think it deserves to win?

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