WNBA Apparently Giving It Another Shot

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Vol 43 Issue 21

Clinton Dropping Out Of Iowa?

An internal memo from from a Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton campaign staffer urged her not to run in the Iowa caucus, stating that she would probably...

Nation Mobilizes For Beautiful Weekend

NEW YORK—"It may mean sacrificing TV shows and even chores, but we cannot sit idly by as this gorgeous weather rolls in," said one resident, checking multiple forecasts.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Pop Culture

Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

WNBA Apparently Giving It Another Shot

SACRAMENTO—Sports fans nationwide reported feelings of surprise, amusement, and grudging admiration after discovering that the Detroit Shock and Sacramento Monarchs of the Women's National Basketball Association met Saturday in what seems to be the first game of the WNBA's 11th season. "Hey, if these ladies want to try and go for it one more time, more power to them," said basketball fan Theresa Jacobsen, who came across an advertisement for the game while checking ESPN for news of the basketball playoffs. "You really have to respect their persistence, going out every year like this no matter what." Details such as the final score of the Shock–Monarchs game, the times and locations of other WNBA games, or the names and locations of other WNBA teams, were unknown as of press time.

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