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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.
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Woman Stalked Across 8 Websites By Obsessed Shoe Advertisement

LAWRENCEVILLE, GA—Expressing her growing unease at repeatedly spotting the same picture and text lurking in the corners of her favorite webpages, local woman Laura Spelman confirmed Monday that she has been stalked across eight different sites by an obsessed Nine West shoe advertisement. “When I first saw the ad for the black ballet flats in my Facebook news feed, it seemed harmless enough, but then I went to check the forecast on Weather.com and it was waiting there for me—it’s really kind of disturbing,” said Spelman, adding that she has taken to scrolling away from the fanatical ad as fast as possible whenever she catches sight of it. “I thought it was over when I started reading an article on Google News, but then it just popped right up out of nowhere and startled me. The creepiest part is that it even seems to know my shoe size. I just want it to stop, but it won’t leave me alone.” At press time, the obsessed promotion had grown bolder and more invasive, harassing Spelman with the shoe in question as well as a rotating carousel of five other similar styles.


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