adBlockCheck

Woman Who Admits To Having Watched Golden Globes Thinks Jodie Foster Embarrassed Herself

Top Headlines

Entertainment

‘Rugrats’ Turns 25

This August marks the 25th anniversary of the premiere of Rugrats, the beloved Nickelodeon cartoon about intrepid baby Tommy Pickles and his group of toddler friends. Here are some milestones from the show’s nine-season run

Your Horoscopes — Week Of August 9, 2016

ARIES: Your life’s story will soon play out in front of movie theater audiences across the country, though it’ll only last about 30 seconds and advertise free soft drink refills in the main lobby.

Director Has Clear Vision Of How Studio Will Destroy Movie

LOS ANGELES—Saying he can already picture exactly what the finished cut will look like on the big screen, Hollywood film director Paul Stanton told reporters Wednesday he has a clear vision of how studio executives will totally destroy his upcoming movie.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 14, 2016

ARIES: Once the laughter dies down, the party favors are put away, and the monkeys led back inside their cages, you’ll finally be given a chance to explain your side of the story.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Woman Who Admits To Having Watched Golden Globes Thinks Jodie Foster Embarrassed Herself

OSSINING, NY—After actually admitting to other human beings that she spent the previous night watching the entirety of the Golden Globe Awards on television, local accounting manager Sophie Rhodes announced on Monday that actress Jodie Foster had embarrassed herself. “I love Jodie Foster, but to be honest, her Lifetime Achievement speech was pretty painful to watch,” Rhodes declared before offering, without any apparent shame, her opinions on the night’s hottest red carpet looks, nominees in the Best Actress in a Mini-Series or Motion Picture made for Television category, and other aspects of the three-hour-long ceremony hosted by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association. “It’s hard to believe she got up there in front of all those people and rambled on like that. It’s like she had no awareness of how she was coming off at all.” After explaining that she “expected a little more taste and class” from Jodie Foster, Rhodes told reporters she was glad a number of commenters on TMZ.com agreed with her assessment.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close