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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Wrestling Fan's Comments Alternate Between Admitting It's Fake, Forgetting It's Fake

STATEN ISLAND, NY—During a recent screening of WWE Friday Night SmackDown, wrestling enthusiast David Graziano fluctuated between an awareness that the match he was watching was completely scripted and a willingness to treat the event as though it were 100 percent real. "[Chris] Jericho isn't even coming close to landing those punches," said Graziano, who, seconds later, gave a pained shout as wrestler Edge chopped Jericho across the chest. "That chair-hit looked dumb as hell, but Jericho should have dodged low and slapped on the [finishing move] Walls of Jericho. Nobody can get out of that." Graziano later commented on how old the Undertaker was looking, and how the Deadman wouldn't be able to single-handedly bury people alive for too much longer.

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