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Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Top Family Vacation Spots

With school out for the summer, families are packing up and hitting the road. Here are The Onion’s top family vacation destinations.
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Yellowstone Park Attempts To Increase Ranger Population With New Mating Program

JACKSON, WY—In an effort to revitalize its rapidly dwindling ranger population, officials at Yellowstone National Park unveiled a new mating program this week in hopes of doubling the endangered employees' numbers by 2015. "It's vital we act now and save these once proud rangers before it's too late," said National Park Service director Jonathan Jarvis, adding that his staff had already begun identifying alpha males, monitoring the fertility cycles of several females, and preparing specially designed enclosures that would encourage copulation. "We've matched more than 15 active breeding pairs and now just have to wait and pray that they successfully mate." Park sources also said that, if Friday's singles' mixer doesn't go well, some of the more resistant female rangers may have to be tranquilized and artificially inseminated.

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Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

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